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Post Info TOPIC: Alanon Step 8 (((11-5-17)))


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Date:
Alanon Step 8 (((11-5-17)))


Al-Anon. Step eight; "made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all."

C2C reading page 242 guilt is a burden that keeps  us from giving ourselves,  freely to the present. I can begin to rid my mind guilt by quietly admitting where and when I have done wrong to people including myself.  In this step, we become concerned with the harm I have caused others. The guilt I brought to myself and the desire to do what I can to clear it away .

My share

When I first entered program I honestly did not think that I caused anybody any harm. However I did have an underlining fear and guilt because of living with this disease. I truly thought that I caused it ,was responsible for all the unhappiness in my marriage and every one else's life. I thought I was all-powerful. Thanks to this program and working the steps, I discovered that many of my well meant actions were destructive and hurt people---. Even though I didn't realize it.
 
My inability to be honest and open about what I wanted  was a huge detriment to  my intimate relationship. I would manipulate control and perform many negative actions in order to obtain what I wanted. These were tools I developed as a child and carried into adulthood  My sponsor suggested that these tools may hurt others, however they hurt me even more.-- It was then suggested that  I place myself at the top of this list. That is exactly what I did and then proceeded to make amends to myself by attending meetings working with a sponsor, and developing new constructive tools to live by. Within a very short time I was able to complete  my 8 th Step list of people that I owed amends to  and honestly  understand how I had harmed . Naturally, this included my husband, my son, and my immediate, family . I found I did for others what they could do for themselves and took away their incentive and initiative because of this. I owed amends.
Throughout the many years in program I have performed several step eight and nine  I try to keep myself abreast of what is going on within , by doing a 10th step every every night. This action step keeps me aware and current.
Please remember that the only action that is asked of us in this step is to make the list.   becoming ready to make amends is simply achieved by prayer and meetings. I became ready.as I said,  in this manner,



Step eight questions

Have I resisted making a list? If so why?

Have I considered praying for the willingness?

How willing you might to be completely honest?

How does the God of my understanding play role in the step? Have they can I encourage those I sponsored to begin working this step?
 
Can I share with my group my thoughts, feelings and challenges with the step? Did I use my fourth step is a tool and preparing my list?

Do I recognize when my minding someone else's business may have harmed them or others? 

Am I willing to recognize the need for amends?




.


__________________
Betty
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