Step Nine - Made direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
From: Al-Anon Works pg. 59 (copyright 1995, by Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.)
Having listed those we have harmed, we are now faced with the task of making amends. We canot undo what has been done in the past. We can express our regrets and make a commotment to try not to repeat past mistakes, but what's done is done. By taking Step Nine, we rid ourselves of the guilt that has weighed us down for so long. By facing the harm we have done and finding the most suitable form of amends for the sitution, we can clean up whatever mess we have created and leave the past in the past.
Love in Recovery - Dot
dot said
Feb 18, 2007
Step Nine
For Me, Step Nine was very cleansing. I had left a lot of havoc along the way with my family. They could just as easily turned their backs on me. but they didn't. They welcmed me with open arms.
As I told them, I couldn't change the hurt I had caused them - I was sorry for it - and I intended to live differently.
Later I was able to care for both my Mon and my brother, whom I had hurt the worst, when our rolls reversed and I became the caretaker.
Love and hugs - Dot
-- Edited by dot at 19:35, 2007-02-18
Vicky R said
Feb 18, 2007
hi Dot thanks for that , this quote speaks well today for some things I learned from the programme :
hugs llol Vickyr x
From: Alanons 12 Steps and 12 Traditions Works pg. 59 (copyright 1981, by Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.)
" Many relationships to which alcoholism once brought dissension and misery may still be mended . We found many an occasion in our daily lives when we could convey our regrets to the alcoholic, other family members and our friends , tactfully , maybe with a bit of humor , to avoid reviving painful memories of the drinking days. We also made amends when we showed interest in anothers well-being, activities and achievements. Thoughtful courtesies suggested a basic change in our own attitudes and the way we behaved toward others. More gentleness, tolerance , and acceptance along with our own sense of dignity did much to restore inner harmony. "
For Me, Step Nine was very cleansing. I had left a lot of havoc along the way with my family. They could just as easily turned their backs on me. but they didn't. They welcmed me with open arms.
As I told them, I couldn't change the hurt I had caused them - I was sorry for it - and I intended to live differently.
Later I was able to care for both my Mon and my brother, whom I had hurt the worst, when our rolls reversed and I became the caretaker.
Love and hugs - Dot
-- Edited by dot at 19:35, 2007-02-18
hi Dot thanks for that , this quote speaks well today for some things I learned from the programme :
hugs llol Vickyr x
From: Alanons 12 Steps and 12 Traditions Works pg. 59 (copyright 1981, by Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.)
" Many relationships to which alcoholism once brought dissension and misery may still be mended . We found many an occasion in our daily lives when we could convey our regrets to the alcoholic, other family members and our friends , tactfully , maybe with a bit of humor , to avoid reviving painful memories of the drinking days. We also made amends when we showed interest in anothers well-being, activities and achievements. Thoughtful courtesies suggested a basic change in our own attitudes and the way we behaved toward others. More gentleness, tolerance , and acceptance along with our own sense of dignity did much to restore inner harmony. "