I just celebrated 4 months clean and sober, but I don't think I am doing the work on the steps the way I should be. My sponser relapsed after 12 1/2 years of sobriety. I was never a very religious person and I am finding it very hard to give myself to a higher power. Has anyone ever felt like this?? Please Help. Thanks. Kevin.
mikey50 said
Apr 10, 2007
Hello ...and welcome Kevin I too did not no anything about HP ...i never been to Church ...or anything.
Sombody once told me AA does not Demand you belive in anything that you just be willing. All you really need is to be Honest...Openminded...Willing =HOW If i could recomend reading Big Book..More About Alcoholism ... about insanity of the kind thinking ..that leeds to that first drink....
And the 12x12 step 2...get yourselve a dictionary to ..good luck to you
notcrazy62 said
Apr 13, 2007
hi Kevint
I started recovery an Agnostic. What helped me with Step 2 was seeing that a group of people with similar problems could help each other. Do we do it perfectly, of course not. Spirituality for me was learning that I could feel connected to other people. I used people as my drug of choice to avoid my pain. In recovery I chose not to ignore it any longer. I like the tradition that says there is a loving God. This has nothing to do with any religion. For a long time in recovery I used nature as my church. It helped me to become more humble. Like standing on a beach looking at the ocean, it helps me realize that I really am powerless over many things. Yet, there is 12 step recovery to help me. There is a section in the big book about how many of us come to recovery as agnostics. I had to admit that I made a mess of my life, not God. But the wonderful thing about the program is that each of us can find spirituality in our own way. For me, just seeing that there are good things in this world, not just the ugliness helped me begin to believe. Mankind has sought meaning, and usually not really found it. I think what really matters is how we help each other without demeaning anyone. I really came to see my problems not as just problems, but also a reason to enter recovery, where I gained more than I ever thought possible.
peace
Dave
ack said
Apr 22, 2007
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
I personally always felt there probably was a higher power, but it was kind of like the relationship of me standing over an anthill and watching it-- if I were "HP", and the ants were the people, you can see there is no relationship there nor could i tell one ant from another nor would i care about any of the ants. BUT it didn't bother me the concept of a higher power, it was just meaningless to me. I did come to believe that I could be restored to sanity, from what I saw in meetings. Whether that was "God" or not wasn't really an issue (for me). (The spiritual awakening doesn't come in step 2, particularly, it comes 'as a result of these steps' and that takes time.)
What I have seen some people relate to is a story a guy told in a meeting once. He was in a halfway house and they were moving furniture around and someone told him to move a huge old desk into another room. He laughed! No way one person could move that desk. Not just the weight, but also having to thread it through a doorway.... Anyway, several guys got together and moved that desk to the new room. Then someone pointed out to him how the group of guys was a power greater than himself, since he could not move the desk, but the group effort could.
A power greater than yourself does not have to be God. And I don't think step two says to give yourself to a higher power. It says you came to believe that a power, some power, any power in the universe greater than your own individual self could restore you to sanity. Step 2 does not ask you to submit to that power or agree with that power or ask that power for help or anything. Just-- can you believe that it is theoretically possible. That is all.
aunitedway said
Apr 27, 2007
i think that courage to change book~ for yesterday april 26 says it wonderfully. i typed it up for a friend;lol. i'm in hopes you have a copy of *courage to change. It is a great daily reader. if ya dont, please do try to locate one. and One Day at a Time is a good one too. local library has copies of the Daily Readers., so does half price books in the united states and (this website) has a recovery books link , sells them too. taken directly from my courage to change book for 4-26 i just replaced to read (any/ a 12 step) program. lol.
The most important words many of us hear when we first come to (a 12 step program) are , "take what you like and leave the rest." Everything about our program is suggested, not required. This gives us the freedom to pick and choose. If we disagree with something, we dont have to use it. If we are not ready to use a Step, slogan, or tool, we are free to wait.
Many of us need time to come to terms with the spiritual nature of the (12 step) program. If we are required to believe in a Higher Power in order to participate, we might never have continued to attend meetings. Eventually, many of us do come to believe in a Higher Power because we are free to come to our own understanding in our own time. That way, whatever we learn will have meaning for us.
when we take what we like and leave the rest, we give ourselves permission to challenge new ideas, to make decisions for ourselves, and even to change our minds.
reminder ......Because i am able to use whatever i find helpful and leave the rest, i can benefit from the experience, strength, and hope of others and still follow my heart.
"with the help of this program and my Higher Power, I take charge of fashioning, shaping, choosing what kind of life I will have." ..... In All Our Affairs
Hope this helps. Take care YOU! please also to visit the topics boards for posts from others on the subject. (((kevint))) your in my thoughts and prayers for strength.
WORK IT your WORTH IT!
kevint said
Apr 28, 2007
Thank you "AUnitedWay" just for today, I won't use. Just for today. When tomorrow comes NOONE will know what is in store for us. You just have to work it from day to day. That is one thing I did learn. Thanks for everyones advice. Kevin.
Blessed said
Jun 18, 2007
Dear Kevin, I am truly sorry to hear about your Sponsor. I will pray. You have had a lot of advice so I will keep it short. I was insane when I got to A.A. A God hater, confused about everything except wanting to quit drinking and ?. I was told by my first Sponsor to read the Big Book and follow the directions that were given to me by that person only. "I DID." I was "BROKEN," "CRUSHED" but not destroyed. I walked and talked to the air simply and plainly surrendering up my life to the God of Abraham. Everyday I did just that, I walked and talked to the Air, and Walked and talked and Walked and talked and Walked and Talked. I didn't see a burning bush but I had just enough FAITH to keep going until the next Day and so on. Now I LOVE GOD, his SON JESUS and I am taking it "ONE DAY AT A TIME."
All we have is "One DAy at a Time" so enjoy every moment you can because it may be your last or your loved ones last.
I too did not no anything about HP ...i never been to Church ...or anything.
Sombody once told me AA does not Demand you belive in anything that you just be willing.
All you really need is to be Honest...Openminded...Willing =HOW
If i could recomend reading Big Book..More About Alcoholism ... about insanity of the kind thinking ..that leeds to that first drink....
And the 12x12 step 2...get yourselve a dictionary to ..good luck to you
I personally always felt there probably was a higher power, but it was kind of like the relationship of me standing over an anthill and watching it-- if I were "HP", and the ants were the people, you can see there is no relationship there nor could i tell one ant from another nor would i care about any of the ants. BUT it didn't bother me the concept of a higher power, it was just meaningless to me. I did come to believe that I could be restored to sanity, from what I saw in meetings. Whether that was "God" or not wasn't really an issue (for me). (The spiritual awakening doesn't come in step 2, particularly, it comes 'as a result of these steps' and that takes time.)
What I have seen some people relate to is a story a guy told in a meeting once. He was in a halfway house and they were moving furniture around and someone told him to move a huge old desk into another room. He laughed! No way one person could move that desk. Not just the weight, but also having to thread it through a doorway.... Anyway, several guys got together and moved that desk to the new room. Then someone pointed out to him how the group of guys was a power greater than himself, since he could not move the desk, but the group effort could.
A power greater than yourself does not have to be God. And I don't think step two says to give yourself to a higher power. It says you came to believe that a power, some power, any power in the universe greater than your own individual self could restore you to sanity. Step 2 does not ask you to submit to that power or agree with that power or ask that power for help or anything. Just-- can you believe that it is theoretically possible. That is all.
i'm in hopes you have a copy of *courage to change. It is a great daily reader. if ya dont, please do try to locate one. and One Day at a Time is a good one too. local library has copies of the Daily Readers., so does half price books in the united states and (this website) has a recovery books link , sells them too.
taken directly from my courage to change book for 4-26
i just replaced to read (any/ a 12 step) program. lol.
The most important words many of us hear when we first come to (a 12 step program) are , "take what you like and leave the rest." Everything about our program is suggested, not required. This gives us the freedom to pick and choose. If we disagree with something, we dont have to use it. If we are not ready to use a Step, slogan, or tool, we are free to wait.
Many of us need time to come to terms with the spiritual nature of the (12 step) program. If we are required to believe in a Higher Power in order to participate, we might never have continued to attend meetings. Eventually, many of us do come to believe in a Higher Power because we are free to come to our own understanding in our own time. That way, whatever we learn will have meaning for us.
when we take what we like and leave the rest, we give ourselves permission to challenge new ideas, to make decisions for ourselves, and even to change our minds.
reminder ......Because i am able to use whatever i find helpful and leave the rest, i can benefit from the experience, strength, and hope of others and still follow my heart.
"with the help of this program and my Higher Power, I take charge of fashioning, shaping, choosing what kind of life I will have." ..... In All Our Affairs
Hope this helps. Take care YOU!
please also to visit the topics boards for posts from others on the subject.
(((kevint))) your in my thoughts and prayers for strength.
WORK IT your WORTH IT!
I am truly sorry to hear about your Sponsor. I will pray.
You have had a lot of advice so I will keep it short.
I was insane when I got to A.A. A God hater, confused about everything except wanting to quit drinking and ?. I was told by my first Sponsor to read the Big Book and follow the directions that were given to me by that person only. "I DID."
I was "BROKEN," "CRUSHED" but not destroyed. I walked and talked to the air simply and plainly surrendering up my life to the God of Abraham. Everyday I did just that, I walked and talked to the Air, and Walked and talked and Walked and talked and Walked and Talked. I didn't see a burning bush but I had just enough FAITH to keep going until the next Day and so on.
Now I LOVE GOD, his SON JESUS and I am taking it "ONE DAY AT A TIME."
All we have is "One DAy at a Time" so enjoy every moment you can because it may be your last or your loved ones last.
Love Blessed