ML here....powerless over my emotions.... .just my personal experience.. ...not the 'truth' of Emotions Anonymous (see them online if interested)...take what you need and leave the rest.....
STEP ONE: "We admitted we were powerless over our emotions - that our lives had become unmanageable. "
I hit my bottom about 15 years ago. I no longer knew how to live with my emotions or 'act' upon them without my life becoming unmanageable.
How can my life look and become unmanagable? This is just a sample of some of my 'acting out' from the past....I push people I care about away. I am always angry, blaming, pointing fingers at what others have done or said 'to me'. I hold resentments. I have many judgements about myself and others. I am terrified, hurt, full of sorrow and self pity. I can't stop crying. I want to end my life I am in so much pain. I feel useless. I stock pile resentment or I beat myself into a pulp..hating myself and all that I think about and feel. My expectations of myself and others are either much too high or very, very low. I believe I am unique and alone in these feelings. Nothing and no one can help me. I am in a state of panic, anxiety or dark black depression.
I have been given 'diagnosis' of certain mental illnesses. I can hide behind these or face them with Program if I want to 'get well'. I have an illness, I can now accept that wholeheartedly but I don't relinquish my 'responsiblity' to continue to 'live' well.
With Program practice I am realizing I am human....and that I am not 'bad' or alone....I am simply powerless over my emotions. I have professional help and medication but I also work the Emotions Anonymous Program in order to continue to 'grow up' emotionally. It's helped my recovery immensely.
Program offers me a personal solution. It's up to me to take it. If I am honest about my first step, and working it and my steps to the best of my ability while strengthening my relationship with a Power Greater than me I know I am heading in 'sane' direction. How do I know.....I start to experience serenity, hope and some happiness. It starts with me being honest.
kiwikid1 said
Feb 26, 2008
I find your post very interesting. After years of stuffing down my emotions (since childhood) and trying to keep everything under control I now seem to have little control over emotions of anger, guilt and self hate. Don't know what to do other then try to talk about my issues with others and try to build a new positive person on the ruins of a past life.
I have two young boys who I have to be healthy for. They are all that matters.
ML here....powerless over my emotions.... .just my personal experience.. ...not the 'truth' of Emotions Anonymous (see them online if interested)...take what you need and leave the rest.....
STEP ONE: "We admitted we were powerless over our emotions - that our lives had become unmanageable. "
I hit my bottom about 15 years ago. I no longer knew how to live with my emotions or 'act' upon them without my life becoming unmanageable.
How can my life look and become unmanagable? This is just a sample of some of my 'acting out' from the past....I push people I care about away. I am always angry, blaming, pointing fingers at what others have done or said 'to me'. I hold resentments. I have many judgements about myself and others. I am terrified, hurt, full of sorrow and self pity. I can't stop crying. I want to end my life I am in so much pain. I feel useless. I stock pile resentment or I beat myself into a pulp..hating myself and all that I think about and feel. My expectations of myself and others are either much too high or very, very low. I believe I am unique and alone in these feelings. Nothing and no one can help me. I am in a state of panic, anxiety or dark black depression.
I have been given 'diagnosis' of certain mental illnesses. I can hide behind these or face them with Program if I want to 'get well'. I have an illness, I can now accept that wholeheartedly but I don't relinquish my 'responsiblity' to continue to 'live' well.
With Program practice I am realizing I am human....and that I am not 'bad' or alone....I am simply powerless over my emotions. I have professional help and medication but I also work the Emotions Anonymous Program in order to continue to 'grow up' emotionally. It's helped my recovery immensely.
Program offers me a personal solution. It's up to me to take it. If I am honest about my first step, and working it and my steps to the best of my ability while strengthening my relationship with a Power Greater than me I know I am heading in 'sane' direction. How do I know.....I start to experience serenity, hope and some happiness.
It starts with me being honest.