Thsi is my first ever "chat" experience. I have been married to an alcoholic for 16 years-for most of them he was an active alcoholic. He just recently returned home from one of the best treatment centers in the country. However, after just 10 days-he relapsed. He is jobless, and refused to go to meetings-except his once a week aftercare meeting. Today he said "I didn't intend to relapse" it just happened. I wouldn't let him get away with that. I called it B.S. and said "you didn't use the tools they gave you" and so yes you did mean to relapse. I also told him it was too early for him to return-however, there is not anywhere else to go-even the cost of the sober house in our area is too expensive. I called the treatment center for help in the middle of the night-they promised to have someone call today-but the call hasn't come through yet. I need ideas on what to do next. I went to an alanon meeting last night for the first time in about a year, but I'm not finding many answers-I am truely frustrated!!!!!
Blessed said
Mar 28, 2008
Hi Betty,
My names Blessed and I am a Recovering Alcoholic with 14 years. Plus I am also a sick AL-Anon with no Recovery in Al-Anon. The best thing I can say to you or anyone else including me is that maybe you should go to a few open A.A. meetings and listen to the people in the rooms. Please continue your own Recovery because that is what is best for you. Al-anon is where I also need to be because my Son, father, sister, mother, ex-husband, sister, and current husband all have or are drinking. So as you can see i have lots of issues tied to drinking and my behavior does as well. It's the behavior that is the problem in me that needs to be changed with God's help. His Mercy is new everyday and it is for you too. Please remember that GOD LOVES YOU and YOUR HUSBAND.
I have a husband that doesn't work any program either. He is doing it his way and has lost 2 jobs this year. GOd certainly is in Control of everything here on this planet. I know I am not! I was reading a friends Big Book the Alcoholics Anonymouis book today in a meeting and on page 449, it is my favorite passage in the entire book. it talks about acceptance being the KEY to ALL my PROBLEMS. That I have to learn to accept LIFE on LIFES terms. Not mine. When I start living in the solution instead of the problem, things get better.
Relapses occur so forget about it! Move on and I can't give advice about what to do about your husbands drinking. But I would go to your meetings and they will help you. I will hold you in thought and prayer.
Love in Recovery,
Blessed
Thsi is my first ever "chat" experience. I have been married to an alcoholic for 16 years-for most of them he was an active alcoholic. He just recently returned home from one of the best treatment centers in the country. However, after just 10 days-he relapsed. He is jobless, and refused to go to meetings-except his once a week aftercare meeting. Today he said "I didn't intend to relapse" it just happened. I wouldn't let him get away with that. I called it B.S. and said "you didn't use the tools they gave you" and so yes you did mean to relapse. I also told him it was too early for him to return-however, there is not anywhere else to go-even the cost of the sober house in our area is too expensive. I called the treatment center for help in the middle of the night-they promised to have someone call today-but the call hasn't come through yet. I need ideas on what to do next. I went to an alanon meeting last night for the first time in about a year, but I'm not finding many answers-I am truely frustrated!!!!!