Wondering if anyone has a few questions (or a worksheet of some kind) they used to work Step 3 when they were there. I know what to DO in a theoretical sense, but...how do I get there emotionally? Any advice? Thanks!
hotrod said
Sep 5, 2012
Hi Again Mimi
I am glad you have a sponsor and are attending alanon. he questions that you refer to can be found in one of the readers I think it is in "How alanon works" I have listed a few below/ You are posting to a Step Work Sectionn of our Message Board. The main alanon Board , where many share there ESH can be reached by going tohttp://alanon.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727
I be;ieve you may have to register for that Board as wll but you will reach many, receive loads of support and responses.
Glad you are here.
Activities
1. To remember this Step, you may find it helpful to write it down in the form of an affirmation. For example; "I have turned my life and my will over to the care of God today. All is well."
2. If you knew that all was well and on schedule in your life today, how would you feel? If you knew that things were being managed by a power great than your self in a way that would work out to your best interests, how would you act differently?
3. If you knew you had no power to control events, outcomes, or a particular person, how would you behave differently? What would you say or do? What would you stp saying or doing? What would you do differently for yourself in order to enjoy your own life now, to live in the present moment?
4. If you weren't allowing someone else to control you, what would you be doing differently? What would you do today with your life? How would you feel?
5. If you weren't allowing a particular circumstance to control you, or if you weren't trying to control that circumstance - if you just let it be and accepted it as okay for the present moment - how would you feel? If you weren't fighting with or resisting this circumstance, what would you be doing? How would you be feeling?
6. Taking this step often puts you in touch with yourself. Listen to yourself. Write about what you feel, want, need, and think. Then pick up the phone and share who you are with someone safe, someone you trust. Talk in a way that reflects self-responsibility, not victimization. Don't ask them to rescue you. Ask them to listen and accept you as you are.
7. What is the most loving, most nurturing thing available to you right now that you can use to take care of yourself and enjoy life? What will you do with it?
-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 5th of September 2012 01:47:42 AM
hotrod said
Sep 5, 2012
Hi Mimi Welcome to Miracles in Progress
I have been in progam for many years and work the 3rd Step each mornig when I awaken.. I open with the serenity prayer and then center myserlf and offer my life and will to HP for that day. I then do my daily readings and am off. I trust that as I stay focused on my HP during the day I will be guided to His will.
We have worked this Step in the Spring on the Board. Heres is a Link to the Alanon postings
Thanks, Betty. I actually do everything you've mentioned (Serenity Prayer and daily reading each morning, and trying to center myself and turn my life over to my HP's will), BUT... <smile> as I work through the steps formally with my sponsor, I'm just wondering if there are any worksheets or questions to consider in helping me "work" this step (there seem to be for other steps)...or maybe this step is more internal by its nature? I will ask my sponsor her thoughts on this when we get together this weekend. (Not a shocker, but I may be overthinking this!)
I have a 19-year-old daughter who is my qualifier. I first started attending Al-Anon when I was pregnant with her 20 years ago (!), but after her father and I divorced (he has never found sustained sobriety), I stopped going and forged ahead as a single mom. I remarried 10 years ago, and now I face my daughter's addiction. It's been a very tough year, but I am grateful that I knew about Al-Anon and had the support of my family as I returned to working my recovery in earnest this year. I find that I am able to work a stronger program this time around, and I need it, since I can't (or don't want to) divorce my child. I have been lucky to find a home group that is made up of parents of alcoholic/addicts, and it is my life line.
I'm excited to have found this website, and I look forward to utilizing it as a new resource in my recovery.
Thank you for responding and welcoming me.
Best,
Mimi
MimiW said
Sep 5, 2012
Awesome! Thank you, Betty! I really like to process in writing, and your questions were perfect. I plan to do some journaling tonight with these in mind.
Wondering if anyone has a few questions (or a worksheet of some kind) they used to work Step 3 when they were there. I know what to DO in a theoretical sense, but...how do I get there emotionally? Any advice? Thanks!
Hi Again Mimi
I am glad you have a sponsor and are attending alanon. he questions that you refer to can be found in one of the readers I think it is in "How alanon works" I have listed a few below/ You are posting to a Step Work Sectionn of our Message Board. The main alanon Board , where many share there ESH can be reached by going tohttp://alanon.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727
I be;ieve you may have to register for that Board as wll but you will reach many, receive loads of support and responses.
Glad you are here.
Activities
1. To remember this Step, you may find it helpful to write it down in the form of an affirmation. For example; "I have turned my life and my will over to the care of God today. All is well."
2. If you knew that all was well and on schedule in your life today, how would you feel? If you knew that things were being managed by a power great than your self in a way that would work out to your best interests, how would you act differently?
3. If you knew you had no power to control events, outcomes, or a particular person, how would you behave differently? What would you say or do? What would you stp saying or doing? What would you do differently for yourself in order to enjoy your own life now, to live in the present moment?
4. If you weren't allowing someone else to control you, what would you be doing differently? What would you do today with your life? How would you feel?
5. If you weren't allowing a particular circumstance to control you, or if you weren't trying to control that circumstance - if you just let it be and accepted it as okay for the present moment - how would you feel? If you weren't fighting with or resisting this circumstance, what would you be doing? How would you be feeling?
6. Taking this step often puts you in touch with yourself. Listen to yourself. Write about what you feel, want, need, and think. Then pick up the phone and share who you are with someone safe, someone you trust. Talk in a way that reflects self-responsibility, not victimization. Don't ask them to rescue you. Ask them to listen and accept you as you are.
7. What is the most loving, most nurturing thing available to you right now that you can use to take care of yourself and enjoy life? What will you do with it?
-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 5th of September 2012 01:47:42 AM
Hi Mimi Welcome to Miracles in Progress
I have been in progam for many years and work the 3rd Step each mornig when I awaken.. I open with the serenity prayer and then center myserlf and offer my life and will to HP for that day. I then do my daily readings and am off. I trust that as I stay focused on my HP during the day I will be guided to His will.
We have worked this Step in the Spring on the Board. Heres is a Link to the Alanon postings
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t46898221/alanon-third-step-3/ You did not mention what program you are in so I have NG
Glad you are here
Thanks, Betty. I actually do everything you've mentioned (Serenity Prayer and daily reading each morning, and trying to center myself and turn my life over to my HP's will), BUT... <smile> as I work through the steps formally with my sponsor, I'm just wondering if there are any worksheets or questions to consider in helping me "work" this step (there seem to be for other steps)...or maybe this step is more internal by its nature? I will ask my sponsor her thoughts on this when we get together this weekend. (Not a shocker, but I may be overthinking this!)
I have a 19-year-old daughter who is my qualifier. I first started attending Al-Anon when I was pregnant with her 20 years ago (!), but after her father and I divorced (he has never found sustained sobriety), I stopped going and forged ahead as a single mom. I remarried 10 years ago, and now I face my daughter's addiction. It's been a very tough year, but I am grateful that I knew about Al-Anon and had the support of my family as I returned to working my recovery in earnest this year. I find that I am able to work a stronger program this time around, and I need it, since I can't (or don't want to) divorce my child. I have been lucky to find a home group that is made up of parents of alcoholic/addicts, and it is my life line.
I'm excited to have found this website, and I look forward to utilizing it as a new resource in my recovery.
Thank you for responding and welcoming me.
Best,
Mimi
Thank you!
- Mimi