I recently used step 8 to prompty admit my wrongoings to my girlfriend and her son. As a result I was tossed from house and living in a motel. Should I have lied?
hotrod said
Dec 21, 2013
Hi
Step 8 asks only that we make a list of the people we have harmed and become ready to make amends This step follows the fiirst 7 that proceeded it and should have been worked with a support person.
No you should not have lied about your situation. If your partner could not accept the harm you spoke to her about--- that is unfortunate, There are no guarantees that relationships will last after recovery.
-- Edited by hotrod on Sunday 22nd of December 2013 04:54:14 AM
johnnyb said
Dec 22, 2013
I am trying maybe step 9 is where you make amends. dosnt matter...im toast
DavidG said
Dec 22, 2013
Hmmm. Hi Jack
In Step 8 we are merely willing to make amends... would it pay you to look at the second part of step 9?
Mostly here we go to a trusted third person first- before we share issues with our loved one... huh?
David G.
Alanon and ACA member.
pp said
Dec 25, 2013
I agree with Betty and David...a sponsor can determine if your motives are honest and the delivery of your amends is kind and compassionate and with the best timing.
I recently used step 8 to prompty admit my wrongoings to my girlfriend and her son. As a result I was tossed from house and living in a motel. Should I have lied?
Hi
Step 8 asks only that we make a list of the people we have harmed and become ready to make amends This step follows the fiirst 7 that proceeded it and should have been worked with a support person.
No you should not have lied about your situation. If your partner could not accept the harm you spoke to her about--- that is unfortunate, There are no guarantees that relationships will last after recovery.
-- Edited by hotrod on Sunday 22nd of December 2013 04:54:14 AM
In Step 8 we are merely willing to make amends... would it pay you to look at the second part of step 9?
Mostly here we go to a trusted third person first- before we share issues with our loved one... huh?
David G.
Alanon and ACA member.
I agree with Betty and David...a sponsor can determine if your motives are honest and the delivery of your amends is kind and compassionate and with the best timing.