8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
When I worked this step from the perspective of how my ACoA behavior affected the people around me, I realized that I owed amends to someone I didn't realize I had hurt. She didn't even realize she was damaged. But it was clear that my behavior was the spark that turned her into a shallow, materialistic gold digger. So think about how not taking care of yourself affects others.
Also very often there are people we have harmed who have harmed us worse. It can be very difficult to think about making amends to someone who should be making amends to you. But do it anyway. It can free you from the hold this person has on you, freezing you in place and keeping you from developing. And remember...
Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
- Malachy McCourt
So even if they don't deserve amends, be willing to make them anyway. It will help you.
-- Edited by JamesCT on Tuesday 24th of December 2013 02:27:02 AM
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
When I worked this step from the perspective of how my ACoA behavior affected the people around me, I realized that I owed amends to someone I didn't realize I had hurt. She didn't even realize she was damaged. But it was clear that my behavior was the spark that turned her into a shallow, materialistic gold digger. So think about how not taking care of yourself affects others.
Also very often there are people we have harmed who have harmed us worse. It can be very difficult to think about making amends to someone who should be making amends to you. But do it anyway. It can free you from the hold this person has on you, freezing you in place and keeping you from developing. And remember...
So even if they don't deserve amends, be willing to make them anyway. It will help you.
-- Edited by JamesCT on Tuesday 24th of December 2013 02:27:02 AM