9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
I will prescribe regimens for the good of my patients according to my ability and my judgment and never do harm to anyone.
the Hippocratic Oath
You have taken an honest look at how your behavior has affected those around you and you feel remorse for the damage caused. This is good. You want to try to make things right. This is also good. But sometimes you can make things worse by trying to make them better. So look very carefully at the likely result of your actions and if things are better left as they are, then leave them. And if you're not sure, err on the side of not making amends, as you can do so later if things change.
I remember reading that "helping" a bird break through his or her shell deprives them of the needed exercise to strengthen them enough to deal with the world once emerged. Look at holding back on making an amend that way.
DavidG said
Jan 7, 2014
hi James...
I think we often take the steps forwards and forget the lessons we learned along the way. Our lives were like that, because the information, and the training was incomplete. I think it is good for me to talk a Step 9 over before executing it. I did one last week. It wasn't too shameful in the emotional sense... but it was hard to find someone to talk it over with. It was not a step I can easily complete- my actions had long term and wide ranging consequences.
My first stage of the step was to quit making the same error. I think I did that some time ago- but I was frozen, not knowing what the alternatives were. Or even how to find alternatives.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
You have taken an honest look at how your behavior has affected those around you and you feel remorse for the damage caused. This is good. You want to try to make things right. This is also good. But sometimes you can make things worse by trying to make them better. So look very carefully at the likely result of your actions and if things are better left as they are, then leave them. And if you're not sure, err on the side of not making amends, as you can do so later if things change.
I remember reading that "helping" a bird break through his or her shell deprives them of the needed exercise to strengthen them enough to deal with the world once emerged. Look at holding back on making an amend that way.
hi James...
I think we often take the steps forwards and forget the lessons we learned along the way. Our lives were like that, because the information, and the training was incomplete. I think it is good for me to talk a Step 9 over before executing it. I did one last week. It wasn't too shameful in the emotional sense... but it was hard to find someone to talk it over with. It was not a step I can easily complete- my actions had long term and wide ranging consequences.
My first stage of the step was to quit making the same error. I think I did that some time ago- but I was frozen, not knowing what the alternatives were. Or even how to find alternatives.