At the basis of my powerlessness is my self-centeredness........this becomes apparent often, and in particular at the beginning of my Program experience. I never knew just how self-involved and protective I was of "MY point of view", my feelings, my world, my, my, me, me, mine.....
I couldn't allow much of anything to occur in life that didn't have a direct correlation to me.....I was always the 'center'....the world revolved AROUND me.......it was mine, every experience but on a very personal level.......good or bad.....somehow I felt RESPONSIBLE....either overly responsible and needing to DO something or under-responsible, allowing me to be victimized by my own thinking.......poor ol' pitiful me.......
Surrender and Recognition......or vice versa......this became the key and still is to me seeing where I am and what I am 'playing' at.....if I have my fingers stuck in other people's pies, if I am overpersonalizing every little action or statement made around me, if I am feeling 'beaten up' by the world.......these are all things that can be put into perspective if I am willing to say the Third Step prayer and do a bit of 'follow through' - maybe repeating the serenity prayer all through the day whenever I am tempted to stick my finger in other people's business or over personalize (by victimizing or martyring myself) what is going on, being said or happening around me.
Just a little insight I had today.......
Yours in Program.......
Tahir said
Dec 26, 2006
Thanks again, for that insight, even though I must admit when I was reading it, it seemed that it is an insight on me
Blessed said
Jan 25, 2007
Hi all you Children of God,
What a beautiful day it was today and yesterday because I am looking through sober eyes today. Seeing the green trees, lawn, rocks, squirrels, rabbit, dog, flowers,wood, paint,cars,glass,sky,water,food,freedom. That I only have by "The Grace of GOd," because of my willingness to just listen to somebody else other than myself a few years back. Because don't you know, that I knew everything about every subject even if I didn't I would fight you until you finally gave up. "I WON," Hurray Victory. So I thought, my declaring victory over a self-centered defeatest purpose. I didn't win anything! I lost every friendship with every woman I ever met. Men only were with me for you know what, and I was with them for you know what, and you know who! All and all it was a very unhappy circle of life. When you and I help other people it's the most unselfish, loving, kind act we can do. Praise God! I Love People! Don't You?
ML here......powerless over my emotions......
At the basis of my powerlessness is my self-centeredness........this becomes apparent often, and in particular at the beginning of my Program experience. I never knew just how self-involved and protective I was of "MY point of view", my feelings, my world, my, my, me, me, mine.....
I couldn't allow much of anything to occur in life that didn't have a direct correlation to me.....I was always the 'center'....the world revolved AROUND me.......it was mine, every experience but on a very personal level.......good or bad.....somehow I felt RESPONSIBLE....either overly responsible and needing to DO something or under-responsible, allowing me to be victimized by my own thinking.......poor ol' pitiful me.......
Surrender and Recognition......or vice versa......this became the key and still is to me seeing where I am and what I am 'playing' at.....if I have my fingers stuck in other people's pies, if I am overpersonalizing every little action or statement made around me, if I am feeling 'beaten up' by the world.......these are all things that can be put into perspective if I am willing to say the Third Step prayer and do a bit of 'follow through' - maybe repeating the serenity prayer all through the day whenever I am tempted to stick my finger in other people's business or over personalize (by victimizing or martyring myself) what is going on, being said or happening around me.
Just a little insight I had today.......
Yours in Program.......
What a beautiful day it was today and yesterday because I am looking through sober eyes today. Seeing the green trees, lawn, rocks, squirrels, rabbit, dog, flowers,wood, paint,cars,glass,sky,water,food,freedom. That I only have by "The Grace of GOd," because of my willingness to just listen to somebody else other than myself a few years back. Because don't you know, that I knew everything about every subject even if I didn't I would fight you until you finally gave up. "I WON," Hurray Victory. So I thought, my declaring victory over a self-centered defeatest purpose. I didn't win anything! I lost every friendship with every woman I ever met. Men only were with me for you know what, and I was with them for you know what, and you know who! All and all it was a very unhappy circle of life. When you and I help other people it's the most unselfish, loving, kind act we can do. Praise God! I Love People! Don't You?
In God's Love,
Blessed