From "Paths to Recovery" pg. 54 (Copyright 1997 by Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permision of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.) " The person to confide in needs to be chosen with care. Experience has shown it is best not to select our spouse , partner , a family member or the alcoholic. They are too close to us or too involved with the events we will discuss. We do not want to choose anyone who might be wounded by our version of events. We need someone who is not involved with our individual situation , who can keep a confidence and listen with empathy. We seek someone who will not criticize us , but who will be able to suggest to us any obvious omissions or to give us insight into how the nature of our wrongs has affected us. We may ask them to help us see patterns in our behavior and how a defect is often the flip side of a strength " Happy New Year all llol Vickyr x

Vicki, thanks for using the Paths to recovery book for this step. It is alot easier to understand than some of our older books. Step 5 for me wasnt easy. I did it with a clergy the first time and I was so confused. I blamed everything that had gone wrong in my life on the alcholics. I didnt feel any better when I left. A few years after being in the program I worked my step 4 over and did my 5th step with my sponsor. She was able to listen and make suggestions to help me do a 5th step that I really needed. I poured out everything I thought was wrong in my life and she showed me there were options and that I needed to work on myself and to make sure I remember to count all the good things in my life. I have done a few 5th steps now and I look at everything in a whole new light and I know to take care of me first. If I dont take care of me first I cant help anyone else.