Step One

celeste · Newbie

Step One

Vicky R · Senior Member

Hi Celeste,

welcome to Miracles in Progress. You might find some of the shares here helpful if you take it with a pinch of salt. I don't think there are any sponsors here. You could also look up 'Alateen' in a search engine where you can get people that are qualified to help someone of your age group. Whatever you decide please take care on the internet !

llol Vickyr x

leev · Newbie

hi celeste, i am new to this site as well and a five year member with a gasp five year break from al-anon. i too want to start at step one. at this point, i believe that i am in the cognitive stage. i am an adult child and have been experiencing intense trauma when people i love are drinking (even when they are not "drinking drinking") anyway, step one and staying in the now are my goals for as long as it takes. i know i am powerless, but i don't seem to always shake the feelings when i get upset about drinking. how to you "use" the tools you have.
thanks
lee

cookie1971 · Member

Hi Celeste,

I too am starting my 12 steps. I have been to the Al-Anon board for the last 3 months, and have also attended a few f2f meetings. I realize that I am powerless over alcohol, and that my life has become unmanagable. I am the wife of an alcoholic and also an adult child (my father was an A).

I know that I need to do the 12 steps for myself, because I can't live like this anymore.

I thank God that you all are here.

Love and Blessings,

Cookie

Canada66 · Newbie

Hello everyone, I'm new here.

My partner was alcoholic. He killed himself in an alcohol related accident over 12 years ago.

He knew he had a problem. The relationship was rocky with a couple of break ups/reconciliations.

I loved him a lot. But did very little "Saving". Only when it affected me or the kids directly. I always knew I was powerless over alcohol/drugs. I always knew his consequences were his own.

I would get angry when his behaviour affected me. The worst of it was during the times when we were split up. We had a business. An example of how this affected me: we were split up. He had another apartment but I was picking him up in the morning for a business meeting. He was passed out in the middle of the floor, no amount of hammering on the window would wake him up. I couldn't take care of business by myself, so I had no choice but to reschedule the meeting. If I had shown up to the meeting and explained to the clients that my partner was a drunk and that's why he's not there, we would have lost their business!

One time though, he was passed out on my doorstep, freezing weather, no jacket. I knew he'd freeze to death. I called his brother who came to pick him up. I guess that is enabling him not to freeze to death. I could have not made that call. Was my only other option really.

He killed himself a couple of years later in an alcohol related car accident anyway. So I guess the call gave me, him, and our children a few more years with each other.

In any event, I do know I am powerless over alcohol, and any effort I make to try to control alcohol drugs or anyone elses use is futile and can only hurt me.

Canada66 · Newbie

I have questions on how this works.

How am I awarded step 1? How do I know when to go to step 2? Do we just "know"?

I do realize I am powerless over alcohol/drugs, many other things in life. Do I work on step 2 if I realize this?

Blessed · Senior Member

STEP ONE

Dear Newbies,

WHen working the program of A.A. or AL-Anon you really need face to face meetings as well as coming here to share. Go online and look up your nearest meetings around your neighborhood.

Go to one then another and hit 90 meetings in 90 days. Raise your hand when they ask when you got Sober or when you came into the program. Pick up literature at THE MEETINGS. GET A SPONSOR, Work the 12 Steps with a Sponsor.

I don't suggest you try to do it online. It isn't the same as having a human being there with you to talk to.

I have a Sponsor, go to meetings still and it isn't the same as just being here. SO go meet some new friends and enjoy your Recovery.

Blessed

Vicky R · Senior Member

hi Canada, just to answer your question as for this board there are some 'stickies' at the top which layed out how we plan to go about the steps on here which is different for each group/board/meeting etc,

hope you find it helpful here,

llol Vickyr x

Blessed · Senior Member

To all the Winners,

In order to teach the 12-Steps the way that the Big Book teaches. You have to learn the 12-Steps the way the BIg Book teaches. RIGHT?

I have posted some things about how to start with a Sponser in A.A. But if you all are going to meetings and have a sponser I sure would Love to here from you. I myself have a Spnsor. Her name is Gayle B. and she has less time than I do, but she works a really good program and goes to allot of meetings. So I asked her to be my Sponser.

My other SPonser died a year 1/2 ago and I had a rough time adjuting to loosing her. it wasn't something I was preparred for. Not that death usually is but her's came and took her in 3 months from Brain Cancer. My new Sponser has beat lung Cancer for a couple years so I am hopeful she will be a success story.

Here is how I have stayed in Recovery almost 14 years.
GO to meetings. Face to face
Get a Sponser.
Work the steps right away 1-12 ( No Excuses)
Run with the winners.
Listen to what you want and leave the rest in the meetings. (Get a phone list and use it) Same sex only (womens meetings)
After a few months get a service commitment like Coffee person, chairs so on. SPonser should tell you this)
Stay away from Slippery people places and things.
Don't get involved in a relationship for at least a year.
DOnt get to Hungry angry lonely or tired. HALT
DOn't eat, drink, or have anything with alcohol in it. No mouthwash, cough medicine, binaca, chocolates, truffles, mincemeat, don't even drink Near beer. There is no Such thing. If it's near it's HERE.

Besides all of this I am a Church goer and I Love GOd. The reason that I have included it down here is because it is my personal life. I can't preach to anyone so I will not impose my life upon others.

I do hope and pray that I have given you all something you can use to help you. I certainly can benefit from others sharing too.

Thanks,
Blessed

Learn how the 12 Steps work. Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! We discuss each of the Twelve Steps In the order they are written, one step at a time, every two weeks.