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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Step Work -> Step Work -> Question(s)
Post Info TOPIC: Question(s)
Huscroft6


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Hey all, newbie recovering Alcoholic here, going on 15 days :)    Longest in 6 years.  Anyhow I have a few question, basically regarding AA meetings since Ive only been to 1 (along with my outpatient classes) and am a bit uncomfortable being very new to the meetings as far as what to do/be prepared for.

 
1.  I see that there are Open and Closed meetings, I know the Open are welcoming anyone, I'm assuming that I am eligible for the Closed ones and that their is no type of "membership/pre-requisite for the Closed meetings?  If not, how do I become eligible.
 
2.  If I am right, Im pretty sure I have seen the Big Book, is that a big blue book kind of like the size of a bible??  If not, what is the book?   If that is it, how do I get one of those books so that I can attend the BB meetings?
 
3.  Regarding the 12 Step Meetings Im a bit confused, I know what the 12 Steps are, by that I mean not memorized at all, but I know of them.  But for any meetings that deal with the 12 steps, is their any pre- requisite to attend one of these meetings while they are in progress of the steps?  Cause I've heard some deal with different steps and for me to just show up, I wasn't sure if that's OK no matter where I jumped in.  So if you could go over the 12 step meetings and if there is anything I need to do prior to attend, Id appreciate it greatly.
 
 
Anyway, if someone could answer these with some detail so I could start attending meetings feeling a bit more "knowledgeable" I would greatly appreciate it, as well as any other useful info that may help me with being comfortable in my 1st few meetings.  Thanks for any and all help


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Dave Harm


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Hi Huscroft,

Congrats on 15 days! As soon as you say "I'm an alcoholic," you became welcomed to closed meetings.

You are right about your description of the Big Book and the easiest place to get one and retain your anonymity is at a meeting. Usually someone has one for sale.

This early in recovery, me personally, I'd go to regular open and closed AA meetings and find a sponsor. Let that person work with you on the steps.

MIP also has a great AA board you'd probably get a lot out of - LINK

Best Wishes,
Dave


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"A busy mind is a sick mind.  A slow mind is a healthy mind.  A still mind is a divine mind." - Native American Centerness

Creating Dreams, from the nightmares of hell...
Huscroft6


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Thanks alot Dave!

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QuietMorning


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Good morning, Huscroft,

I've shared some things with my husband. . . some things are received well, other things - well. . .not so well.  I'm with Dave - there are many things that he has no concept of or understanding because he does not work the program, himself. 

When I was married to my ex Ahusband - I read the Big Book from cover to cover to try to understand his perception of life and the disease itself.  I was also in Alanon.  He wasn't ready, and as long as we were married, was never ready to work the steps/program, himself. 

It's been suggested to my husband for him to read the ACOA book so that he can understand what I'm trying to share - he has stated that he is going to. . .so we'll see. 

My husband has stated MANY times that "she handles stuff like this better - SHE has the tools to do it."  So he does notice a difference in my actions.  For me, that's been the best doorway to communicating my program.  He asks why I do this, or why I'm so calm in such and such situation. . . and of course, I step right through that open door. 
'
Everyone's different and comes to terms with their own lives in different ways.  For us, there are times when it's sharable, and others when it's not so much.  Respecting his ability to conceive the process is.  I try really hard not to push it. . .and that's sometimes hard for me. . .as I see him pick up a tool, agree that it would really help, then put it back down and dismiss it. 

There are more than my two ways of doing things, so I try to place it back into the hands of my HP.  Several weeks ago we got into a fight over whether I was going to enable him or not. . . we went downstairs and I was watching one of my fav TV programs, and word for word one of the characters repeated what I JUST told him.  He came out of the bathroom after having heard the TV and had his mouth open. . .lol.  So trusting my HP to do what I can't is a good thing. :)

He did talk to our therapist about it - the therapist told him that I needed a 'support group' - he needed 'therapy'. . .he came home all happy that he gets to have the personal attention of therapy and I 'just get' my support group.  **chuckles**  I'm happy that he's getting what he needs - maybe not the way I'd like it. . .but if it works it works. 


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Beth
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