Alanon 7th Step

hotrod · Guru

Alanon 7th Step

Pushka · Newbie

1. What are your fears about becoming changed? Write about them. Or talk about them with another person.

Fear of the unknown and what if it doesn't work. What if I change and OMGosh .. no one likes me not even me!?

2. How have you already seen yourself changed? How much of this did you actually have to do? How much were you empowered to do? Reflect on the gradual, natural nature of change in your life.

Oh goodness not enough room or time .. lol .. amazing ways, mind blowing ways, things I never thought I could do. I had to ask .. I only had to ask God for help. Step 2 in Pathways to Recovery really spoke to me last night, I know we are on Step 6 however I feel like this applies to me and how much I had to do. Pg 24 at the very top of the page, .. where the woman says "God I can't handle it. This one is all Yours." That's how I feel about character defects I know I can't do them alone. Life changes have forced a few things that maybe I was more ready for than I realized, even though they have come with pain .. I'm still standing and I know I"m going to be ok. Now if I can transfer that to step 6 that would be a good thing. Most things at this point haven't come gradually, it's like I've been on the top of a slide waiting to take the risk and go, now all of a sudden it's just popping left and right. I just needed a direct shove to make me take the risk.

3. Writing letters are a favorite tool of mine. Write a letter to God, as you understand God. In that letter, talk about what bothers you and what you would like to see changed about you. Ask God to help you change those things in yourself and your life that needs changing.

Love letter writing this is one of my favorite things to do as well!!

4. If in doubt about what character defects to work on now, ask God to show you clearly what issues in your life would be improved if you would work the Sixth and Seventh Steps on them.

I only have to look at my kids to know whatever I do it will benefit them in the long run and that's all the motivation I need at this point and time.

5. Do a creative visualization about yourself. Visual in your mind yourself as you would like to become. See yourself doing and being all that you would like to do and be. Then let it go. Come back to now. Affirm that who you are is good. Affirm self

hotrod · Guru

Dear Pushka

Great share on Step 7 I was inspired by your honesty, enthusiasm and recovery

It is true so much of the change that we experience is so gradual that we fail to notice it. That is why reflecting back reviewing where we were before program really gives me the courage to trust Hp to lift what defects He sees need adjustments.

Remember our defects are assets that have crossed a Boundary HP will help us find the Middle Ground

Thanks for your courage

flopadopilus · Veteran Member

1. What are your fears about becoming changed? ~~ I have an upcoming move and I have the fear of having to fit into a new job and school for me and my oldest. Being able to afford it and I know I will be able to just as I have done so here, where we live now. I am feeling more capable which I have always been responsible and a good worker.

2. How have you already seen yourself changed? How much of this did you actually have to do? How much were you empowered to do? Reflect on the gradual, natural nature of change in your life. ~~My attitudes have changed to a much more positive perspective. God has done all the work I have just been open to it happening. I am becoming more serene and able to relax now.

3. Writing letters are a favorite tool of mine. Write a letter to God, as you understand God. In that letter, talk about what bothers you and what you would like to see changed about you. Ask God to help you change those things in yourself and your life that needs changing.~~ God I wrote out my character defects that are holding me back and I seem to be wrestling with letting them go along with unforgivness and some old lingering resentments, please give me the strength to let go of my old worn out ways and embrace the great new changes you have for me!

4. If in doubt about what character defects to work on now, ask God to show you clearly what issues in your life would be improved if you would work the Sixth and Seventh Steps on them.~~God soften me up and continue to show me the things that hold me back and help me to improve to the person I long to be!

5. Do a creative visualization about yourself. Visual in your mind yourself as you would like to become. See yourself doing and being all that you would like to do and be. Then let it go. Come back to now. Affirm that who you are is good. Affirm self~~I have come a very long way in my Al-anon program and am open to seeing my side of the street along with things that I am eager to clean up. I am so appreciative for God and all of you who have helped me to grow in my recovery. I am excited for more change and growth even though at times it is painful and difficult I am open to it!

hotrod · Guru

Dear Floppy

Great work!!! So very much of the Alanon Program is the willingness to change I heard that wiliness throughout your Step 7 post. Your courage, your acceptance and honesty are truly powerful tools that will enables you to continue on this difficult but powerful journey. Remember you are not alone HP walks every step of the way with us.

I was also encouraged when I read that never do we ask HP to add anything to our life just to remove things That is because all we need is already within

Keep on keeping on

Michelle814 · Member

I have discovered that willing my character defects away is just as impossible for me as an alcoholic willing himself to stop drinking. I have to rely on my HP to remove them. This doesn't mean I lay around and do nothing, no. I keep living and moving and when I mess up I promptly pray, I promptly remind myself that was not right and off track and I make a note to not do it again with the help from my HP. I do not beat myself up when I mess up. I can't change on my own, though. Its impossible. I have tried many times and it does not work. When I put it into my HP's hands, however, miraculously changes come. They shift and go and come again based on how much effort I am putting in by praying and writing and giving up the control... but with my HP its possible. I can see I will get there eventually.

hotrod · Guru

Great Share Michelle

I agree we cannot heal ourselves. We can pray, go to meetings, become aware but HP must remove these defects.

I know I am glad that I was not given the power to remove my defects You see-- I thought that many of my assets like: kindness, generosity, compassion were my defects and that my anger, resentment my assets How crazy is that!!! HP had to work on the inside so I could finally understand that my negative walls were just that. Thse defects kept me isolated and alone.

You are growing and doing so well Keep showing iup

hotrod · Guru

Bernie

Thanks for your share and the powerful, touching message.

This program works when we work it

-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 9th of April 2012 11:33:45 AM

Wolfie55 · Member

I read that in step seven we ask God to remove those defects that he could or would based on the conditions of each day.

Back in the days when i was still a skid row drunk, I used to go to AA meetings sometimes usually when I needed money. Anyway the twelve steps and 12 traditions were on these big posters on the wall and i used to read them and try to do them in my head. I figured that by the time I got to step 7 I'd be a pretty cool guy. All my character defects would have evaporated, I'd be like those higher power dudes that sat in the non-smoking section in their shirts and ties and fedoras, I'd probably go on the speaker circuit, start writing for the AA grapevine, and every newcomer that crawled into the room would immediately sense that I was a spiritual giant, they would beg me to sponsor them, we'd go to roundups and conventions and they'd brag about how sober I was getting them.

That isn't exactly how it happened.

I did manage to get a few stories printed in the grapevine. my speaker circuit is about 50 miles in diameter, I managed to get a shirt, a tie, and a fedora, but when my sponcees talk about me, I don't think they're bragging about what a cool guy I am. And those darn character defects, they're still here. I can still be selfish and sometimes inconsiderate of others, and sometimes I am still afraid of things that I needn't be afraid of, and sometimes I say the wrong thing or don't do the right thing, but I'm getting better, one day at a time. I don't do it alone either. You help me. God helps me. My sponsor helps me.

So this was more of an AA share than an Al-Anon one but the steps are the same steps and the process is the same process. Besides, it was a good story and i like the way i tell it. I'm about ready to fall asleep. i think I posted about a hundred times today.

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