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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Step Work -> Step Work -> ALANON STEP 10
Post Info TOPIC: ALANON STEP 10
hotrod


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ALANON STEP 10
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STEP 10

CONTINUE TO TAKE PERSONEL INVENTORY AND WHEN WE Were WRONG PROMPTLY ADMITTED IT

ODAT PAGE 213   A DAILY REVIEW OF MY PROGRESS IS AN ENCOURAGING EXERCISE FOR IT SHOWS ME THAT I AM GRADUALLY LEARNING TO LIVE WITH POISE AND SERENITY

My Share  

This is my favorite Step and although I was told that the Steps should be worked in order I used this Step very early on in program to get to know myself.  I always felt that I was wrong about everything so I changed THE Step in my mind to read when I felt wrong not when I was wrong.  This opened up a huge door for me to explore my actions, thoughts and feeling. 

Each night I would take half an hour and write about my day- all the feelings, all I had done and then reflect on how how my actions affected my feelings and thoughts  I checked how I reacted and never actually acted in a situation.  I saw my assets, my kindness, and compassion and then I saw my anger when I did not get my way, my self pity when I lost something

After I looked at these behaviors and feelings I also examined my motives. What underneath drove my feelings I usually found Fear was the monster that triggered all my negative responses. I then admitted these behaviors to MYSELF I finally was beginning to understand how I was hurting myself and what I needed to do to change. 

My most important tool of keeping myself stuck and hurt was Denial, and Pretend.  I would deny reality and pretend all was well.  This step enabled me to stop using those destructive tools and to learn how to be honest if only with myself at first. 

Today I have made this step an everyday routine and am so grateful for this enormous healthy tool Now when I discover something I need to change I admit it to myself and if necessary to the other person. 

Please share your thoughts on working this Step.  

 

Activity 

1. How do you continue your process of self-awareness and inventorying? Do you spend time each morning or evening reviewing your day? Or do you allow your insights to happen naturally, as you go through life and recovery? Do you combine tactics? What works best for you?

2. When was the last time you caught yourself doing something you didn't feel good about? Did you take care of the issue promptly?

3. Either daily or weekly, forces yourself to find one thing in your life and one idea about yourself that is good. Affirm that good until it sinks in and feels real. Strive to find one thing that you like about someone who is important to you, and then take the risk of telling that person.

4. Watch for ways that fear, anger, and resentment arise in your life. Watch for beliefs underlying these feelings. Watch for ways that your anger toward yourself influences your anger and behavior toward others and yourself. 



 When have I done the same things over and over, yet expected different results? 



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Betty
DavidG


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Posts: 168
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smile Thanks Betty,

When I first came into Alanon I stopped the backwards slide. it did take some time to move forwards. But Step 10 is a good tonic.

As you know I like to work the steps, and the traditions as well. When I came onto the MIP board my theme came from Concept 4. "Participation is the key to harmony." I think that is very simple. In Alanon I am always in very good company. We are all experts in our field.

On this board I want to be a plain-jane member; or should I say plain-john. It meets the needs I have. At my time in recovery I enjoy the company, and I enjoy the journey.

In our meeting ending we always say- let there be no gossip or criticism of each other. In my home F2f meeting this had been an issue- impossible to stop but in the end- let it begin with me. 

But I think some things can be said- and of I say the wrong thing here I can delete.

Sometimes a younger member will come onto the board. No sponsor, not even a group. But I can see the warmth and support... given, and received. aww

We aren't perfect, nor should we try to be. We can only do our best. But I think our best here on MIP Alanon is very good.

Thanks for the share, smile

DavidG.



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Participation is the key to harmony.
hotrod


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Posts: 1023
Date:
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Dear David

Thank you for your thoughts and for working the program with such determination.

You are an inspiration.

Glad you are here.smile



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Betty
John


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I take a daily inventory every morning as a part of my flow of conscious writing (10 minute mental clearing), followed by a quiet, still mediation.  When I first entered Al-Anon my liability list was much bigger than my asset list.  And while I did daily affirmations for and with myself I felt as though I was lying to myself.  But the more I did them, and my daily actions validated what affirmations I was giving myself, I came to believe.  And by moving into self discovery, and recovery, coupled with a strong dose of honesty, I discovered my assets actually outweighed my liabilities.  If the point was to find out I was not as bad as I thought, it worked, and if the point was to find out I was not as good as I thought I was, it worked.  Doing this brought me to the right size, one I can live relatively comfortable with.

John



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hotrod


Guru

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Posts: 1023
Date:
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Thanks John Your honesty and wisdom hold so true.. Being Right Sized is certainly "Pretty GOOD "isn't it. Thanks for sharing your journey

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Betty
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