from 'The 12 Steps for Adult Children'

"Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it"

"Our recovery is similar to a garden. Our lives once belonged to the weeds, our self-defeating behavior, but God has helped to plant a garden in our lives, pulled the weeds and caused some wonderful things to grow in their place. God used the Steps as tools and raised us to a place where things are different. We are beginning to see the promise of fruit, the promise of lasting change. In the midst of this new garden, we can also see the return of the weeds... We must continue to take personal inventory and protect our garden...

"In Step 10, we begin the maintenance part of the Steps. We will learn how to sustain what we have accomplished, become more confident, and proceed with joy along our spiritual journey... Our work is beginning to pay off when we increase our capatiy to develop new and healthier ways of taking care of ourselves and relating to others...

"... With daily practice of the Steps and with our Higher Power's loving presence in our lives, we will be able to achieve and maintain our newfound balance. Our relating skills will improve, and we will see how our interactions with others assume a new quality...

"At this point, we may be tempted to revert to our old bravado and believe we are healed. We may think we have all the answers and can stop here. we feel comfortable with ourselves and see no need to continue with the program. We allow other activities to interfere and find excuses for skipping meetings and abandoning the program. We must resist the temptation to quit and realize that giving in will deprive us of realizing the goal we set for ourselves. our successes can be maintained only if we are willing to depend upon God and preactice the principles of the Steps daily for the rest of our lives...

"While we are working so carefully to monitor our actions and reactions, we must not judge ourselves too harshly. If we do, we face the possibility of returning to our negative attitudes. We need to recognize that nurturing ourselves emotionally and spiritually requires daily vigilance, loving understanding, and patience. Life is never stagnant; it is constantly changing, and each change requires adjustment and growth...

"A personal inventory is a daily examination of our strengths and weaknesses, motives and behaviors. Taking daily inventory is not a time-consuming task and can usually be accomplished within fifteen minutes...

"Three types of inventories are recommended; each serves a different purpose. These are the Spot-Check Inventory, Daily Inventory, and Long-Term Periodic Inventory.

"The Spot Check Inventory - involves stopping several times each day to assess our behavior and attitude. It is a short review of our actions, thoughts, and motives. This review can be useful in calming stormy emotions and it keeps us in touch with our behavior...

"The Daily Inventory - at the end of each day... We should examine ourselves daily to remind ourselves that this program is lived one day at a time... A few things to consider are:

*If we are isolating and feeling withdrawn, we need to reach out and share our difficulties with a friend.

*If we are slipping back, trying to control and manipulate others, we need to recognize this and ask our Higher Power to correct it

*If we are comparing ourselves to others and feeling inferior, we need to reach out to supportive friends...

*If we are becoming obsessive or compulsive and not taking care of ourselves, we need to stop and ask our Higher Power for help. We need to decide what unmet needs we are trying to fulfill and understand how to meet these needs.

*If we are fearing authority figures, we need to find the reason for our fear, acknowledge it, and ask our Higher Power for help

*If we are depressed, we need to discover the central issue causing us to feel withdrawn or sorry for ourselves

*If we are repressing our feelings, we need to take the necessary risks and express our feelings assertively.

"Long-Term Periodic Inventory - can be accomplished by being alone or going away for a time. These are special days that can be set aside for reflection on our lives...

"This inventory can be done once or twice a year and will give us a chance to reflect on our progress. We wil have an opportunity to see the remarkable changes we have made and to renew our hope and courage... These inventories enable us to get a larger perspective of our behavior and allow us the chance to make significant changes. During these special inventories, we will discover new defects as well as new strengths...