hi Dot , I had to think a bit about this one. My decision making is alot better now partly thanks to the programme I can make one and commit myself to it. Usually with sound advice from more than one person in recovery or from my sponsor. But it's difficult sometimes as you say to feel comfortable with that when other people are interfering or disagreeing with what you've spend time and thought deciding. Or when other people keep changing their minds about what you ought to be doing when they feel they want to give advice . Rather than facilitating or being there for you or allowing you an opinion. There's alot written about interference and cliqueyness the literature ... so at least you get less of it in Alanon itself the programme recommends that we keep ourselves physically safe and surrender major decisions to life or the loving HP of our choice or whatever it is that we believe in. Rather to another person's will. Also another refreshing thing is that most people are sober in Alanon at least when they are in the meetings so that helps you to get a clearer perspective of things and the policy of non interruption allows us to try to reach our own inner guidance about what we want to do.  Hope the color sticks this time I wrote it all in purple so if anything is highlighted in another color it wasn't by me ! will get onto step 5 soon , hope you're having a good holiday ,

llol Vickyr x