Step Eleven Al-Anon

dot · Senior Member

Step Eleven Al-Anon

dot · Senior Member

This for me is one of the daily maintence Steps. I'm out of a good hot shower - to get my old bones ad muscles going - then on my knees to talk with my Higher Power. I no longer give Him instructions. Instead I ask for His will for me, not mine, for today.

When I first came into the program, I found meditation almost impossible. Then my sponsor pointed out how much time I spent "meditating" on the a. Where was he? When would he be home? Would he come home and if he did what kind of shape would he be in this time? All the crazy thoughts we've all had.

I started by trying to quiet my mind. For me, sitting by the river and concentrating on one beautiful flower would keep my mind quiet for just a few minutes. As I practiced it became easier and lasted longer until I was able to think clearly - at least for a few minutes.

Now my prayer and meditaion can come at anytime during the day that I find my thoughts and/or actions are making my life unmanageable.

Talking often with the God of my understanding keeps me grounded in today and stops me from projecting into the future that I have no control over today.

Love - Dot

Christine · Member

I've been meditating mixed with yoga for over three years. Not as much as I should, but I do try at least once a day. What a concept to take a small portion of your day & use it to enrich your soul?!!

I find it clears my head & gives me focus, which I need desperately! I communicate with my HP when I do this. Sometimes, I've learned, to just sit in the quietness & listen to my HP.

christine

Vicky R · Senior Member

From: Alanon's Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions pg, 70 (copyright 1981, by Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.)

" The word 'meditation' simply means concentrated thought on a chosen subject , thinking or considering quietly , soberly and deeply , and focusing one's thoughts on something in order to understand it deeply . For many , it is serious and sustained reflection , or mental contemplation of a spiritual truth. Thus, when we meditated , we shut out all distractions and disturbing thoughts about problems and irritations and brought our minds to bear on a single idea. It might have been a phrase, a thought from something we had heard or read ; or , it might have been a specific object we could picture in our minds. "

hi Dot and Christine thanks good to see you both again ! enjoy this step but would not say that I'm especially good at it as yet , put the time in but don't always achieve the desired focus . Hopefully that will come quicker in time as does faith in the process or in whatever I happen to believe in at the time . No doubt also people will point out to me where I'm going wrong as I turn over each stone ... such syncronicity as we do find in this programme ! Enjoyed reading your shares also , it is true sometimes we can make time where it was lost on obsessive thoughts I know what you mean !

llol Vickyr x

Luvmyhorse · Member

This is what has been missing in my life today, step 11.

My head is like speghetti. I am going to court NOv 17th for grandpoarent rights. My daughter is afraid I will tell her children age 1 month, 5 and 7 years about their alcoholic grandfather and his abuse. She is in realtionship with him and he has been a parent alinator.

I need to do all I can to protect my grandchildren. If I don't get visitation, at lease I will have known I did all I could. He sexually abused my other daughter from the time she was 5 until she was 15, when I found out. I tried to excuse him at that time because he had stopped drinking and I blamed the abuse on his drinking. He never went into a program of recovery even after another daughter kept her children away from him.

I

wallsal55 · Member

Meditating for me is doing whatever it takes to clear my head. My thoughts can ramble on what my sober spouse is doing or not doing. Or it can ramble on what I am doing or not doing (not getting done). When my life is focused on me (it's like a committee takes up talking in my head). It seems like a no-win situation. But picking up a book, recovery books, alanon literature, books on humor, a $3 movie (usually G or PG, keep it light!), working my favorite puzzle in the newspaper, prayer.....whatever it takes to clear my head.

Sometimes, I burn a candle or three (carefully, never leaving them unattended). I have collected a few tiny lamps with low watt bulbs to illuminate a dark corner. I even bought me a blue lava lamp! I sometimes dig into bric a brac for colorful knick-knacks, vases, and do a little room makeover, but believe me---Keep It Simple, Nooooo Martha Stewart makeovers. Surfing the web, attending a alanon meeting or an open meeting, helps empty my head! It is in the meetings where I find my "HP" or "God" at work---which always totally blows me away. Varying my routine, if possible, breaks up boredom, monotony, allowing spontaneity, serendipity to happen--once in a while.

I am not perfect, most days are still a challenge. (Certain ideas, thoughts, notions, feelings, fears, what to rent space in my head! [Thank God, as time has gone on, other people take up that space less often!]

I rejoice in the days when I can come up with 1 or 2 things that went well today! I'll have to see if it was a connection to my HP that day, or what---that makes the difference.

annah · Newbie

To me meditating goes hand in hand with reading. I have been making a point of reading something constructive first thing in the morning. Sometimes I am too wrapped up in negative thoughts to take in what I am reading. Then I read it out loud and more than once if need be. I work on focusing on what I am reading and think about what I am reading. Doing this has drastically improved my state of mind most days.

Also, to me step 11 goes hand in hand with step 1, 2 and 3. He can, I can't, I will let Him.

Luvmyhorse · Member

annah wrote:

To me meditating goes hand in hand with reading. I have been making a point of reading something constructive first thing in the morning. Sometimes I am too wrapped up in negative thoughts to take in what I am reading. Then I read it out loud and more than once if need be. I work on focusing on what I am reading and think about what I am reading. Doing this has drastically improved my state of mind most days.

Also, to me step 11 goes hand in hand with step 1, 2 and 3. He can, I can't, I will let Him.

Thank you Annah,

Back to basics is where I need to be.

Step1. I am powerless over at this time to protect and love my grandchildren and my life has become unmanagable as I wake up each morning thinking about my loss.

Step2. have come to believe that going to court is my only obtion and have a court date for visitation on Nov 17th

Step 3. I have turned my will and our lives over to the care of my God and the court knowing that I will have done all I could to give these young children a pleasant time and memories of grandma.

Step 11. Will continue to improve my conscious contact with God for direction for my day and until court act as if I have no grandchildren. What would I be doing if I had no grandchildren?

Enjoy my home, pets, friends and hobbies

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