Step Work

lollyloopp · lollyloopp

Hi all! I am new here and been reading up on the step work. First, I'd like to introduce myself: I am a 28 year old married mom of 4, ages 9, 5, almost 4, and 3 weeks! I am also a professional and take pride in my accomplishments with my career. I work for a religious-based non-profit...

cedarpines · cedarpines

What does "exact nature of our wrongs" mean? If i am a perfectionist - is it because i was taught to be that way? Any esh? Thanks Cedarpines

Carla · Carla

Hello all, I feel that I'm not ready for step 5. Am I avoiding it or did not really complete 1,2, 3 and 4.? I still have many questions and the feeling that step work is too fast. What do I do? best, carla (toto)

dot · dot

Fifth Step - Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. 1. If I have completed my Fourth Step inventory, how do I feel about sharing details of my past with another human being? 2. How can telling someone else the exact nature of my wrongs enhance my a...

amanda2u2 · amanda2u2

from "The 12 Steps for Adult Children" "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." "Step 5 requires that we engage in honest confrontations with ourselves and others by admitting our faults to God, to ourselves, and to another person. By doing so, w...

amanda2u2 · amanda2u2

from the '12 Steps and 12 Traditions' book: "Made a searching and fearless inventory of ourselves" "Creation gave us instincts for a purpose. Without them we wouldn't be complete human beings. If men and women didn't exert themselves to be secure in their persons, made no effort to harvest food...

gsdgirl36 · gsdgirl36

This is a tough one. My A keeps telling me NOTHING is my fault, but I know that's not true.... I AM TOO CONTROLLING of others and situations In an effort to keep my life in one piece, I have become a control freak. I used to have the ability to be flexible and spontaneous, but that is gone. Everythin...

dot · dot

Step Four - Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. From: Paths to Recovery - pg. 42 (copyright 1997, by al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.) It is often said at meetings that the...

angelinme908 · angelinme908

Is it the time of year? There are so few people posting on the steps in the last few weeks. I know that as I am still working on step four, I haven't posted for step 5 but what about others? Missing the ESH. Angelina

Carla · Carla

Hi, One of the things that turned up in step 4 works is a childhood memory. I was the oldest of 5 children , both parents were dysfunctional. When one child was sick, we usually gave it to the next and we all stayed in bed. I remember when it was our turn with the mumps. The 3 bo...

DeSpErAtEinLV · DeSpErAtEinLV

Hi, I am new to this forum. I have been in and out of these rooms for three years now. I am currently doing step three and it is really hard for me. When I was a little girl, The God that I knew didn't keep me safe. He didn't protect me. How am I supposed to turn my will and my life over to him? I want to. I want to trus...

Carla · Carla

Hello Fellow Acoas, Well, I understand that you are on step 3, right? Well, here is my confusion. I was one who thought I had to earn love and approval with my deeds and my deeds were never enough, so, of course, it follows that I turned into a superachiever and everyone hated me eve...

barbara · barbara

What exactly is Step 3? I understand its a Letting Go, feeling like we have a safety net. But is it giving up obsessing over something we have no control over? or is it letting others decide the outcome?

amanda2u2 · amanda2u2

Step 3 was the hardest of all of them for me. Trust is a big issue for me, as described in the ACoA Step 3. Having been abused in one way or another for most of my life, I trusted absolutely no one, including myself, and including God. My 'understanding' of God at that point was that he was like my father, slig...

Carla · Carla

Hi acoa friends, Yep, step 4, 150 negative, criticizing thoughts did I find. I thought for step 4, I would make a list of fearless inventory items, so I came up with 152 negative realizations! Ha! You would think I could at least find 10 positive thoughts about myself! So, item 153 is: "a...

wille · wille

hello to all, Happy new year! The steps are so grounding and central to recovery. Heck I am still figuring out whut it means to recover. I have put up boundaries with or to some members of my family and open doors to other family members as they show their knowing to program ideolog...

bobl · bobl

What is my concept of a HP at this time? What would it take to allow my concept of my HP to change? Have past experiences affected my concept of a HP? If so, how? What do I hope to gain from accepting the concept of a Power greater than myself? Do...

dot · dot

I stayed at Step Three for several years because I couldn't seem to turn anything over for very long - consequently without believing in a Higher Power I felt I was failing. Then one night at an AA/Al-Anon discussion meeting an AA friend pointed out to me that the only thing I had to do in Step Three wa...

pscsquint · pscsquint

Hello, I am new to this site, and new to ACOA. There was no alcohol or drug abuse in my family. They were just so totally dysfunctional that I can identify with the Laundry List, the Problem, the traits and now am seeking the solution. I have just started to write in my journal about ever...

rollie · rollie

Hi, I am new to all this and I thought it would be nice to share my story, although I am finding that everyone's story is very similar to mine. My husband, the addict, has been sober for over a year now. YEAH!!! Although he is not living the AA philsophy like he has in the past. But I thought I would feel be...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	New here! Working the steps (Preview) Hi all! I am new here and been reading up on the step work. First, I'd like to introduce myself: I am a 28 year old married mom of 4, ages 9, 5, almost 4, and 3 weeks! I am also a professional and take pride in my accomplishments with my career. I work for a religious-based non-profit...	lollyloopp	10	981	Feb 10, 2006 by Pluto14
	Step 4 Question (Preview) What does "exact nature of our wrongs" mean? If i am a perfectionist - is it because i was taught to be that way? Any esh? Thanks Cedarpines	cedarpines	2	1177	Feb 7, 2006 by cedarpines
	Am I ready? step 5 (Preview) Hello all, I feel that I'm not ready for step 5. Am I avoiding it or did not really complete 1,2, 3 and 4.? I still have many questions and the feeling that step work is too fast. What do I do? best, carla (toto)	Carla	6	1161	Feb 6, 2006 by dot
	Fifth Step Questions (Preview) Fifth Step - Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. 1. If I have completed my Fourth Step inventory, how do I feel about sharing details of my past with another human being? 2. How can telling someone else the exact nature of my wrongs enhance my a...	dot	1	1435	Feb 4, 2006 by Carla
	Step 5 - ACoA (Preview) from "The 12 Steps for Adult Children" "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." "Step 5 requires that we engage in honest confrontations with ourselves and others by admitting our faults to God, to ourselves, and to another person. By doing so, w...	amanda2u2	1	1500	Jan 31, 2006 by notcrazy62
	Step 4 - AA (Preview) from the '12 Steps and 12 Traditions' book: "Made a searching and fearless inventory of ourselves" "Creation gave us instincts for a purpose. Without them we wouldn't be complete human beings. If men and women didn't exert themselves to be secure in their persons, made no effort to harvest food...	amanda2u2	1	1348	Jan 29, 2006 by maresie
	Step 4 Inventory (Preview) This is a tough one. My A keeps telling me NOTHING is my fault, but I know that's not true.... I AM TOO CONTROLLING of others and situations In an effort to keep my life in one piece, I have become a control freak. I used to have the ability to be flexible and spontaneous, but that is gone. Everythin...	gsdgirl36	2	1878	Jan 29, 2006 by maresie
	Step Four - Al-Anon (Preview) Step Four - Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. From: Paths to Recovery - pg. 42 (copyright 1997, by al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.) It is often said at meetings that the...	dot	3	1323	Jan 29, 2006 by maresie
	Few postings (Preview) Is it the time of year? There are so few people posting on the steps in the last few weeks. I know that as I am still working on step four, I haven't posted for step 5 but what about others? Missing the ESH. Angelina	angelinme908	3	975	Jan 27, 2006 by amanda2u2
	Step 4-Who has the mumps? (Preview) Hi, One of the things that turned up in step 4 works is a childhood memory. I was the oldest of 5 children , both parents were dysfunctional. When one child was sick, we usually gave it to the next and we all stayed in bed. I remember when it was our turn with the mumps. The 3 bo...	Carla	2	1221	Jan 20, 2006 by dot
	Confused about 3rd Step (Preview) Hi, I am new to this forum. I have been in and out of these rooms for three years now. I am currently doing step three and it is really hard for me. When I was a little girl, The God that I knew didn't keep me safe. He didn't protect me. How am I supposed to turn my will and my life over to him? I want to. I want to trus...	DeSpErAtEinLV	3	1085	Jan 20, 2006 by dot
	The Fine Line- Step 3 (Preview) Hello Fellow Acoas, Well, I understand that you are on step 3, right? Well, here is my confusion. I was one who thought I had to earn love and approval with my deeds and my deeds were never enough, so, of course, it follows that I turned into a superachiever and everyone hated me eve...	Carla	4	1174	Jan 18, 2006 by lollyloopp
	Step 3 AlAnon - is it not obsessing or letting others walk over us? (Preview) What exactly is Step 3? I understand its a Letting Go, feeling like we have a safety net. But is it giving up obsessing over something we have no control over? or is it letting others decide the outcome?	barbara	4	1507	Jan 18, 2006 by lollyloopp
	Step 3 shares (Preview) Step 3 was the hardest of all of them for me. Trust is a big issue for me, as described in the ACoA Step 3. Having been abused in one way or another for most of my life, I trusted absolutely no one, including myself, and including God. My 'understanding' of God at that point was that he was like my father, slig...	amanda2u2	5	1371	Jan 18, 2006 by lollyloopp
	150 negative thoughts! (Preview) Hi acoa friends, Yep, step 4, 150 negative, criticizing thoughts did I find. I thought for step 4, I would make a list of fearless inventory items, so I came up with 152 negative realizations! Ha! You would think I could at least find 10 positive thoughts about myself! So, item 153 is: "a...	Carla	4	1462	Jan 13, 2006 by wille
	It ain't 4 sissies (Preview) hello to all, Happy new year! The steps are so grounding and central to recovery. Heck I am still figuring out whut it means to recover. I have put up boundaries with or to some members of my family and open doors to other family members as they show their knowing to program ideolog...	wille	2	1005	Jan 13, 2006 by wille
	Some Step 2 Questions from P2R. (Preview) What is my concept of a HP at this time? What would it take to allow my concept of my HP to change? Have past experiences affected my concept of a HP? If so, how? What do I hope to gain from accepting the concept of a Power greater than myself? Do...	bobl	11	1672	Jan 13, 2006 by lollyloopp
	Getting past Step Three (Preview) I stayed at Step Three for several years because I couldn't seem to turn anything over for very long - consequently without believing in a Higher Power I felt I was failing. Then one night at an AA/Al-Anon discussion meeting an AA friend pointed out to me that the only thing I had to do in Step Three wa...	dot	3	1345	Jan 12, 2006 by bobl
	Online Meetings (Preview) Hello, I am new to this site, and new to ACOA. There was no alcohol or drug abuse in my family. They were just so totally dysfunctional that I can identify with the Laundry List, the Problem, the traits and now am seeking the solution. I have just started to write in my journal about ever...	pscsquint	6	1196	Jan 12, 2006 by pscsquint
	I'm new... (Preview) Hi, I am new to all this and I thought it would be nice to share my story, although I am finding that everyone's story is very similar to mine. My husband, the addict, has been sober for over a year now. YEAH!!! Although he is not living the AA philsophy like he has in the past. But I thought I would feel be...	rollie	3	1142	Jan 12, 2006 by lollyloopp
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Learn how the 12 Steps work. Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! We discuss each of the Twelve Steps In the order they are written, one step at a time, every two weeks.