If I have completed my fourth step, how do I feel about sharing the details of my past with another?

I feel good about sharing my fourth step with the right person.  I have discovered some things about myself that I want to share and some things that I need to share.

In what areas of my past am I willing to be completely honest?

I feel that I am ready to be completely honest in all areas that I am aware of.  I am ready to face facts.

What are some of the advantages I might get from admitting my faults?

I will grow and change in a positive way.  I may discover that some of my faults are not as bad as I perceive them to be.  I may also discover that some are worse and need more prayer and thought.

Can I see that I am not perfect? How can I quit trying to be?

Living with an alcoholic for 24 years has made sure I know I am not perfect.  The question for me is how can I quit trying to be? I think the answer is to live in today.  To get what I can done today, or to act instead of reacting.  Prayer and reading on the topic are also helpful.  I got my copy of C2C in the mail last week and have loved it!

With whom will I share my fifth step? What qualities makes this person that I choose?

In the absence of a group and sponsor, I have decided to share my fifth step with my sister in law.  She has been a true friend for many years and lives in an alcoholic home too. The most important qualities I see in her are honesty, trustworthiness, and loyalty.  I don't feel like I could ever tell her anything that would cause her not to love me.

Do I have any of these qualities myself? Did I list them under my assets?

I do have these qualities. Yes, I listed them under my assets

How does my desire to be perfect block me from believing someone could love me unconditionally even after hearing my fifth step?

I have worked for a long time to appear as if I have it all together. At least in public.  It would be hard for me to believe that some people would love me after hearing my fifth step.  That is why I have chosen carefully.

In working my fifth step what have I discovered about the exact nature of my wrongs?

I have discovered that many of my character defects are character assets gone wrong.  God gave me an innate compassion for others and I have used it to enable and attempt to fix not only my AH but anyone else who crossed my path looking needy.  In the process, I have neglected my family and my own needs. 

I am also very decisive and outspoken.  At some point in this process, that asset has been moved to the defect side of the page as I use it to beat people down and just in general be mean.

God has shown me my part in many situations and circumstances in my life.

What have I discovered about fear, honesty, trust, and acceptance?

I have discovered that fear will drive me to loneliness and produce more fear.  Honesty may be scary for a time but always feels better that fear. Trust is something I give carefully to people but freely to God. Accepting the things I cannot change is a new thing for me.  It feels good and a little scary.  I am still learning to ask God when I am in a place where acceptance is the right approach instead of change.

Are you in the habit of sharing yourself - who you are - with other people? When was the last time you called someone because you needed to talk about something? Do you talk to people about what you're going through when you're going through it, or do you wait until you've resolved the incident yourself then report it after the fact?

I share myself with other people in a limited way.  Mostly based of common ground.  I do share my whole self with a few very close people.  I do tend to call someone when I'm in the midst of a crisis.  I want to talk it out. Sometimes to the extreme point of obsession.