Step Six Al-Anon

Dot · Member

Step Six Al-Anon

Dot · Member

Step Six - I'm not sure I was ready to have my defects removed. Some of them were what I used to cope when the a was drinking. But I did try very hard to change myself and found that it just didn't work for me. The defects kept coming up and causing me problems.

With the help of my sponsor and sharing in my group I finally became ready to ask for help and was entirely ready to have God remove my defects - trying to do it alone had become too painful.

Love and hugs to you all - I'll be going to the hospital in the morning. Hope to be back in a couple of weeks. Dot

Serenity · Member

Dot,

This is just to let you know that I have kept you in my prayers throughout the Eastertide as I remembered that you had said that you would be off for surgery on 21 March, 2008.

I have taken a break during Eastertide and here I am now sending you this.

I am looking at this step very carefully, as I am not sure what defects need to be removed right now. I have so many...however, I feel that one of unrealistic fear that seems to be subsiding and as I give this fear up, God is working on my Serenity.

So, I will look forward to talking WITH you on your return, and until then I will be by your side in prayer, dear sister in recovery.......and I am asking for a real strength in the post surgical recovery especially for I know how much surgery can take it out of you.

Bless you,

Vicky R · Senior Member

From: Al-Anon Works - pg 56 - (copyright 1995, by Al-Anon Group Headquarters, Inc. Limited use by express written permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.)

Quote :

'At this point, many of us try once more to change ourselves. For instance, if we have always been too busy focusing on everyone elses problems while ignoring our own, we might try to force ourselves to mind our own business. We are often dismayed at how quickly our efforts fail. Although enormous energy goes into focusing on ourselves, many of us find that we continue to be preoccupied with other peoples' lives'

Hi Dot and everyone, good to see you again. Your quote reminds us that we need to share, to get help from people that we feel will be understanding of us and an HP which could be whatever you like e.g. a flower or something. When I first came to the programme my sharing with others received this response - that we are here to focus on ourselves, develop hobbies and interests of our own. Some people find they can do this while living with an alcoholic and others have to change their circumstances. This way of thinking was a complete surprise to me. And therefore very difficult to learn. But there are so many techniques in the programme for 'disengaging' with other peoples' problems. It's an ongoing study,

llol Vickyr x

dawg · Member

I've been one of the more stubborn ones, but I assume there are those more stubborn than I. Maybe I had to exhaust all the ideas, all the practices and teachings I fell in love with and imagined would bring me peace. In hindsight, I see I had to do what I did when I did it, as I assume everyone must.

I became exhausted and depressed. I have not been successful at stopping anything. I did not acquire anything new and nothing has left. Letting somebody else, something else, restore me to sanity, take away my shortcomings, sounds like failure since I was not able to accomplish it on my own.

Gradually it changed for me. Gradually and intermittently I gave up trying to think my way out, fight my way out. I sometimes am able to give up trying to get the things I think I need. That's when I truly listen. That's when my attention comes with an acuteness and awareness I did not know was possible. But it requires, for me, letting go absolutely of any outcomes.

I have a basin of thoughts, swirling all the time. At the surface is reaction. Deeper is reason, logic and restraint. And an even deeper level is a mystery I don't understand. At this deeper level I have encountered equanimity. There was/is no blame, no judgement, no pride, no recalling, nothing. I feel it is this deeper level where I develop compassion. There is no separation. I see myself in others, I feel my pain and it is bearable, and sometimes I get a sense of a greater pain, a sort of collective conciousness. No separation, no I. It's extremely disorienting and I sometimes wonder if I'm finally going over the edge, but I am comforted by the fullness, my body felt sensations and ease with which I can sometimes just sit there.

Words do not describe well. To me, I refer to it when I share at meetings, as a destruction or a jumping off a ring of fire, onto what I imagined were jagged rocks below. I jumped, and I did not die. It is not what I thought it would be, and that is what keeps me coming back.

-- Edited by dawg at 01:50, 2008-04-29

Blessed · Senior Member

Step Six A.A.
Were entirely ready to have God remove our Defects of Character:

This Step may take time to have all my defects of Character removed. However, considering who I was, and who I am today. You would not know me. I am a beautiful human being today that God Loves and Forgives. I couldn't say that 14 years ago.

I still have some glaring defects. My prayer life increases for others when focusing on me. I also reach out and ask our prayer chain to pray for us/me when the battle is too hot.

Praying to my Higher Power whom I call Jesus Christ, answers my prayers always. Yes, no, or wait.

I have no control on any outcome except on my own behaviors.

Today, I pray that each of you have peace, sobriety, and a fullness of Gods Love.

Blessed

-- Edited by Blessed at 08:19, 2008-04-29

Vicky R · Senior Member

wow thanks everyone I had to re-read these. So many different interpretations of Step 6, some more in the abstract 'pure surrender', some more specific working on one thing at a time. Every time I read here something new to learn from. I can relate to some of it from one time or another. Like when you 'jump' and at other times use the 'Think' slogan, it was confusing to work out when to use these tools until I saw that I don't need to work it out !

llol Vickyr x

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